Fight for the future.

We all have insecurities. I know that I have posted numerous blogs about mine. I have no shame in the fact that I am insecure about things. Somethings I don't know or don't understand - that is when I ask - or pine - I pine things over in my head a lot. Mostly when I'm at work. I'll be workin' away and start thinking about something and suddenly....yep, I'm pining.

That'll be my answer next time my boss says I look bored - I'll say "I'm just pinin'..." That should be an interesting conversation. I'll make her pine over my pining!

Anyway, today I returned to work after being out a week from my dental surgery. I have no shame in now admitting openly that I have a false upper plate.

My decision wasn't based on vanity, no.

It was based on the fact that inherited gum diease had cracked the bones within my gums and I would have, within 10 years, lost all my teeth plus have to deal with the heart diease, diabetes that comes along with it. And, also, may have never be able to give birth because the periodontitis diease limits the growth of the fetus in the womb.

I did this purely for health reason. My future was on the line.

That being said, I can also admit that returning to work was nerve-wrecking for me. I was insecure. I know my teeth look great, but I feel crowded in my mouth (which will go away, I'm told) and I have a slight lisp. This makes me FEEL like I look weird.

Today, I emailed Rebecca and this was the conversation:

Me: Do my teeth buck out like Mr Ed's?
Her: uhhh that would be a no!
me: You sure? You'd tell me right?
her: I wouldn't have told you they look good when I first saw you.
me: Okay, I've noticed my top lip doesn't come all the way down yet. maybe it will in time. I don't want PROMINATE teeth, ya know?
her: They don't look promiate. They look very similar to your old teeth but prettier of course.
me: Thank you. Sometimes you just need to hear your not a freak. LOL
her: Your not a freak!!!

I've been on an MSN messageboard since surgery, there is one girl who had her teeth removed at 23. Some of these people have been through so much, life-long battles - like me. I know I'm not alone.

Many of you will probably ask me, why would I let people know? because, my teeth really do look natural - here's why...

While I'm insecure, right now - I'm not ashamed. I have a future without diease and constantaly feeling ill. I will be able to eat and smile and laugh and not have broken and painful mouth anymore. I took control of my life. I live my life for no one else but me.

...and I feel that, it should be that way for everyone.