Epic.

Logan: "I thought our story was epic, you know? You and me."
Veronica: "Epic how?"
Logan: "Spanning years, and continents. Lives ruined and blood shed. Epic! But summer's almost here, and we won't see each other at all. And then you'll leave town, and then... it's over."
Veronica: "Logan..."
Logan: "I'm sorry... about last summer. You know, if I could do it over..."
Veronica: "Come on. Ruined lives? Bloodshed? You really think a relationship should be that hard?"
Logan: "No one writes songs about the ones that come easy."

Veronica Mars

I'm not an expert at relationships, god knows I know how to pick 'em. But, I know myself enough to know what I can deal with and what I can't. I can deal with troubles in a relationship. I can deal with making peace.

I decide within the first ten minutes how far I would let a guy go with me.

Occasionally, this will change once I get more in tune with him. Some people who I think I would want to be in a relationship with turn out to be a completely different person.

But love has never been a word I have tossed around aimlessly.

Romantic love means so much more to me than just saying the words. And I cannot count on one hand how many guys have said "I love you" to me just because they think it'll help them get laid. But you know what this does? It makes me run. Saying "I love you" to me too soon will make me run for the hills faster than someone saying "OJ has a gun!"

It's not that I am scared of love.

Okay, maybe I am scared of love. Love equals trust. Trusting a guy is the most difficult thing for me to do.

Looking back on my past relationships, I am in doubt on if I have ever truly been loved.

Well, I know A loved me. I know he did. But I know he could only love so far. We still acknowledge our past. We are glad that through it all we are friends. But, I doubt the awkwardness of seeing his boyfriend hit on him through facebook comments will ever go away.

I recently went to A for some guy advice. (Yea, I went to my gay ex-boyfriend for guy advice. Shuddup.)

"Q?"
"Sure."
"Straight up honest."
"Oh boy."

I laughed out loud. That 'straight up honest' thing has bite both of us in the ass many times. Even as friends. But, I know what he says is straight from the heart. He wound up being right and I fixed the problem.

14 years of drama, love, passion & pain will leave you with nothing but respect for the other person.

But, back to the topic at hand.

G once told me that I am 'settle down girl'. He said "You're the type of girl that has all her shit together so when a guy wants to settle and get married, you'll be the one."

Yeah, thanks for that. And if guys think I have all my shit together, dude I am completely giving off the wrong vibe.

There is only one guy in my life that what I feel for could be close to love. It's rare that I speak about him except for to my closest friends. The boy has more power than he should ever have with me. The King & Queen of bad-timing, I know our story isn't over. Where it will lead...who knows? He's in my heart regardless if I wind up with him or not.

And if he did marry her. If he did find someone new. If I never see him again. That's okay. Because there was a moment, a piece of time, when the boy looked at me - and smiled.

That makes me lucky.

Which is why I know that I could love him. I want him to be happy regardless of who he is with.

Because like Logan said, they don't write songs about the relationships that come easy.